Coach, baby!

Let's be honest.

I know there are a lot of you that envy me.

Whether its my 5 figure salary, my strange new haircut, or the fact that I'm staying at my parents after having moved away from North Carolina.

Right now you are more than likely crying tears of rage and frustration because you are not me.

Well prepare to cry a little bit longer because I just got a Coach bag for work!

Oh snap.

Lori Ann

Strange but not a stranger

Oh my gosh.

If you ever want to have a crazy day, look no further than my sister Danielle's house.

Here is what went down today at Casa de Monroe!

1. We modgepodged for the first time in history. And yes, it was EPIC.

2. Yes, I did get into a number of verbal altercations with a 3 year old. She always walks away the winner in every fight though. Dang her shrill scream and toddler attention span..

3. We stayed up late eating shrimp and ice cream, watching the newest BBC Sense and Sensibility. And discussing how completely NOT hot was Willoughby.

4. We reviewed our plans to create "reality romances". Enough of this millionaire, damsel in distress, tormented handsome hero crap. Our romances are going to be about twice divorced chain smoking women in their late forties, getting together with unemployed, balding men a few years younger and a few inches shorter than them. And also, we can't always gurantee a happy ending. Maybe they get together, maybe not. Maybe they just live in sin a few months and decide that it's not going to work. You never know with our all new fabulous "reality romances". (check your local bookstores soon!)

5. I told Danielle that my ideal husband would be like Edward Farris, only gay. She asked me how that was going to work and I told her I wasn't looking for a father for my children, just someone to watch reruns of "bath crashers" with :)

Thanks for letting me hang out, Monrobies!! Perhaps we can get together next month for Oktoberfest, and celebrate your proud German ancestory! (Nana Terry is not on that invite list, of course)

Lori Ann

It's like rain on your wedding day

Yesterday, karma (or maybe it was fate? or irony?) smacked me in the face.

Henry, my now former work partner (I'm still crying about him leaving), got into a car accident.

I felt so bad for him but somehow at some point got around to joking about it.

Which is when karma/fate/irony stepped in.

On the way home I got in a car accident.

I curse you karma/fate/irony! It was one thing to take away Henry, but now my trunk lid and rear bumper?

That's crossing a line:)

Lori Ann

I promise to sing to you, when all the music dies

MY DAY IN PICTURES

The always amazing traffic jams on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

Danielle with her new haircut! I guess this officially makes me a trendsetter!

I bought Elly an array of clothes from the thrift store (my favorite place for eclectic back to school ensembles) and all she would wear for the fashion show was this pink hat.

We totally scored Katy these Spongebob slippers. We're generous that way.

On a side note, James told me that he had set some traps up in the bathroom. Five minutes later, he approached me with an invitation to use the bathroom. That kind of great brain type plotting is going to take him far in life. (Once he learns not to alert the victims of his pranks, that is)

I'm proud of all of my Monrobie nieces and nephews!!!

Lori Ann

Come again another day

So,

Y'all know I love my crappy homemade videos. And since Irene has trapped me indoors (as if I normally go out on weekends..hah!) anyway, I have been able to answer all of your unspoken wishes for more of the aforementioned videos.

Enjoy this one. I like to call it "Back to School: The Hurricane Irene Edition"

Lori Ann

If you are not too long, I will wait here for you all my life.

These are what I like to call "end of the world" clouds. I haven't been in a hurricane in years. If I don't make it, tell lots of exaggerated stories of my greatness!

On a sad note, today I found out that Henry is being transferred to another department. All of the plans I made- the Jane Austen movie parties, the BFF shopping trips, the spying on hot Amish boys- they will never be realized.

Oh Henry.

My blog title is a tribute to him. He loves Oscar Wilde.

Lori Ann

I'll make it to the moon

I've learned a lot of lessons in my life.

Don't get a credit card if you don't have a job.

Don't wear heels if you don't know what you're doing.

Don't lend money to friends.

Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line.

Today; however, I learned another powerful life lesson, which I would be remiss if I did not share with you.

Never try to magic erase your own skin.

Oh yes, no matter how much of a good idea it seems like in the moment- your skin will end up looking like this.

and; for those of you who follow my hairstyle and fashion choices religiously, here is the new hair:)

And this is why I don't put many pics on this blog. I look totally insane!!

Lori Ann