You just might find who you are supposed to be

 

It's still hard for me to process how much my life has changed in such a short time.

 

Some of it is amazing, some of it is so so hard.

 

Marriage has been interesting.

 

I will say that I got very lucky in who I married.

 

Rich is the nicest guy.

 

He is patient, forgiving, and supportive.

 

He just wants me to be happy.

 

If I can make it a lifetime with anyone, I think it will be him.

 

Wish me luck.

 

Love always,

 

Lori Ann Walker

Leave tonight or live and die this way

The day the Spinster Chronicles died.

 

 I need to write a few  (like 200) posts about my wedding day.

 

Like how I didn't take EVERY married woman's advice on just enjoy the day but ran around literally all day until I wanted to scream.

 

Or how I finally got "wear fake eyelashes" off my bucket list.

 

 Sadly, they didn't make it all the way to the wedding.

 

 I can't have nice things, people.

 

I also had to run into the Walmart in dress on the way to the wedding.

 

And THEN my sister Erin made me hide in the back of field were parked.(I was lurking around back there for half and hour- like a pedophile :/... then she undid the corset lacing in the back and relaced  until I could barely breath.

 

Then I walked down the aisle to this!
 

  

So, let the thrilling knowledge that EVERY single one of the details will be pored over, analyzed and shared.

 

Right here on the brand new

 

"The (slightly scandalous) Diary of Mrs Walker"!!

 

After exhaustively documenting the wedding, we can move on to my rage umm...thoughts, about married life.

 

 I have SO many things I didn't really listen to but now they are echoing back into my head...for example. several married women told me that your husband will follow you from room to room, that men don't really understand things like cleaning, and  that sleeping in the same bed will make you scream by night 2 "Stop stealing all my covers, you bastard!"

 

So much more to come, people.

 

Enjoy the pics- I have yet to find a single one in which I don't look angry or crazy! :)

 

 

Talk to you soon, people!

 

Lori Ann Walker

Today and every day

The Spinster Chronicles is officially no more. 

I am not sure what to call this thing. 

I am having a hard time remembering what to call myself! 

Love always, 

Lori Ann Walker

Maybe together we can get somewhere

Less than 3 weeks until my wedding. 

I am not stressed really. 

I am NOT looking forward to being the center of attention. 

Which is why I am making the reception more of a fall festival feel than a "my big day" thing with endless traditions and spotlights, etc. 

I think I am more excited to just get my life started with Rich. 

I am going to get a giant white board and write our goals and our chores and our menu on it and I am looking forward to being a team. 

I don't self motivate easily. 

My new job is really cool. 

If I havent' mentioned it before I am working in mental health at Lehigh County Jail. 

It's the place they send people who are newly arrested and can't make bail or who are awaiting trial or who have a shorter sentence to serve. 

IT'S FASCINATING. 

I am also going to be working every saturday with the elderly a nursing care facility. 

My goal is to be out of debt by the end of 2017. 

Rich likes old stone PA houses too and I want us to be able to buy a run down one and fix it up, preserve the history, and have a place for our kids to think of as home. 

Anyway, I just wanted to update you. Because my one goal for this year on here is to blog more.

Lori Ann Hinsdale (for 20 more days!)

And still I dream

It's been seven years since I started this blog. 

Weird. 

I usually make a whole list of birthday goals for every new year and post them here but really, my only goal is to blog more. 

Its so fun being able to look back on memories that I had forgotten and days long past here on this blog. 

It's my nephew Jack's 14th birthday today! 

The first birthday I recorded of him on this blog was his 7th. 

Holy hannah, time flies by. 

I don't see my nieces and nephews often these days but when I do see Jack-Jack he is always making me laugh. 

He told me recently he was into cosplay but quickly clarified that "cosplay is NOT larp'ing!" 

He is probably going to be in the band next year when he starts HIGH SCHOOL....holy hannah. 

He loves to tell puns and jokes and his most recent one that I love was "The police reported that a psychic midget escaped from a mental hospital. They stated "There is a small meduim at large" :) 

I told him today that he remains, to this day, the most beautiful baby I have ever seen. 

I love Jack-Jack so much. 

He has such a good heart and is genuinely so funny and smart. 

I hope he has the best year of his life! 

(Because 14 tends to be pretty epic for most of us, eh?) 

When (or if) you read this one day, Jack-Jack...

You are incredible. 

You are unique in the best way.

You have always brought so much love and happiness to our family.

My life has been so much brighter since that beautiful October day you were born. 

I am soooo blessed to know you and be your aunt. 

Now...stop growing and getting older, thanks! 

Love always, 

Aunt Lori

She took all I ever had

This post is dedicated to my father. 

(and is being written as a stress outlet...sorry you are my target, old man!)

They say a lot of men, when their daughters marry, look at that daughter and see their little girl. 

My father sees this. 

As he watched me make my LITERALLY dollar store invitations by hand, he indicated that he felt I was too caught up in the party and the fussing and wanted way too much.

I needed to focus on the purpose of all of this. 

The marriage. 

For just one day I wish I could give that man ANY other daughter than the three he has. 

I think I will likely be able to bring this wedding in under 500 dollars total. 

My dress was 25, most of the food will be potluck, my cousins are helping with decor, the cake is a gift, and we are borrowing tables and chairs. 

Some people's invitations are more than my whole wedding will be. 

And I just wish he could live in that reality for a day. 

Back to your regularly scheduling blogging about cats and centerpieces later this week. 

Sincerely,

Lori

A father's worst nightmare aka bridezilla of the year! 

From the moment that we met

I have been meaning to post about my fiance. 

Here you go, Spinster Chronicles! 

5 Reasons I am marrying RICH!!

5. Rich is such a nice guy. He is genuinely kind, thoughtful and tells me EVERY SINGLE DAY that I am beautiful. I feel a little bad because I tend to be a little mean and I don't think he realizes that about me :) 

4. He is a convert and wants to learn more and more about the Gospel. I am excited to help Rich build his Gospel knowledge and to keep each other strong in the church. 

3. He will be a good dad. We are both older and who knows if we will be able to have kids. But we are hoping to have one or two and I am SO EXCITED to have him as their dad. 

2. He is a hard worker. Unlike me (I tend to get bored and change jobs every few years) he has worked for the same company for 14 years. He loves his job and is there every single day. 

1. He will always be my better half. They say you should marry someone who makes you the best version of yourself. I know Rich will make me kinder, hard working, more devout, and..in the long run, happier. 

47 days until I am Mrs. Walker. 

I can hardly wait. 

Lori Ann 

To drag the past out into the light

Random Thoughts on a Wednesday

I have been going through my blog and editing and deleting posts and getting it cleaned up and ready to be printed.

Not that I am done blogging.

Fear not!

But I do want to print out the Spinster Years.

Maybe for Christmas.

Anyway, its so funny to remember the last 7 years and the little stories I forgot and pictures I haven't looked at in years. 

I would say a few common themes have emerged in this blog over the last 7 years.

 I tend to do best with "Random Thought" posts. 

My mind resists themed or one subject posts. 

I am 100% the HAPPIEST in Fall. 

Every single fall, my posts become filled with happiness and excitement and a million pictures and goals and just life. 

For every amazing fall, almost every summer is clearly depressing. 

My posts are apathetic and pointless. 

I say "Is summer over yet?" at the end of practically every post.

 I write like someone with a lot of underlying, barely concealed insecurities. 

Frequently apologizing for rambling posts, seeking laughs or approval in blog tributes and weird immature jokes. 

On a related note...

The two biggest changes since the beginning of this blog are:

 increased self confidence 

and 

 falling out of the aunt role I loved so much. 

Maybe it's been the last year. 

Almost dying.

Losing Lily Jane. 

Finding Rich.

Accepting certain things I could never accept before.

I am stronger and be calm and confident about who I am as a person than I have ever been. 

And, as much as I love being 'Aunt Lori' I respect that my sister had to set boundaries for herself and do what she thought was best for her children.

I miss them though. 

60 days until the wedding!!

Lori Ann

Surprise !!

hacked by the old man, muha ha ha ha ha!!! More of Oreo's mad ramblings, I see!

We'll never be royals

Fall is almost here.

The kind of almost that is completely tormenting!

You start to think..."Oh, its nice and breezy..here comes fall" and then the next day is like a sauna 

and you literally lay on the ground in despair.

(or someone does...not me..nope)

About 61 days until my wedding. 

My sister Erin told me that marriage takes "really hard work and a lot of manipulation"   

I am working on breaking Rich down and rebuilding him into the perfect husband. 

I like to send him passive aggressive text messages. 

Like "Ok"

Answering a text someone sends you with just the word "ok" is ALWAYS passive aggressive :) 

ANYWAY...

There are days when I think of not getting married.

I am kind of used to this festive, spinster life. 

I don't like compromise.

I don't like to answer to anyone. 

I don't like men.

But then I think...

"Eh, let's do this!!" 

The next post I will write about him and my wedding and life.

So much change in such a short time. 

Life is strange that way. 

Lori Ann

Far beyond my reach

I always tell my clients that if you want change in your life, 90% of what you need is the desire for change. 

The other 10% is just logistics. 

I am kind of at a crossroads in my life and I want to start a new chapter.

 I like the idea of turning the page and having a clean, blank page to write the next part of my life story. 

It's not that I have been miserable or anything. 

But I will say that I have been stagnant in the last few years.

 And I am not happy stagnating. 

I am comfortable, just not happy. 

So, here's to the next chapter of life- I hope its filled with growth and goals accomplished and crazy fun adventures and whatever else God might have in store for me. 

69 days until the wedding, people. 

I honestly have done nothing and don't plan to until the beginning of October. 

I work better under pressure :) 

Lori Ann 

To find my own

 

I have been tormenting Rich lately.

 

The poor thing.

 

I had to deactivate my facebook because I kept correcting his grammar in the comments section of his posts.

 

And facebook stalking his WEIRD ex.

 

He is so the opposite of me in some ways- laid back, ok avoiding conflict, doesn't overanalyze.

 

I keep asking him "Are you sure you want to marry a therapist?"

 

After dinner tonight, I made him sit with me on the back porch and tell me, in detail, about his family relationships.

 

I've sent him a number of emails asking  about his childhood, his relationships, his work history, his goals for the future, and other somewhat intrusive, interrogation style questions.  

 

Yesterday I sent him an email that  I called 'The Bad List" which was a list of everything that is wrong with me.

 

Everything, people.

 

I told him how I find Twizzlers to be irritating, how I resent league bowling nights, and how I am kind of a man hater.

 

And so much more.

 

I should probably get him on some medication before the wedding...or at least get him started on a heavy drinking habit. :)

 

70 days until the wedding.

 

If he doesn't have a mental breakdown before then.

 

Lori Ann

 

p.s.- Next weekend I am going to meet his mom and brother for the first time. They've been avoiding me....not wise. :)

 

In moments unforgettable

So...for someone who has watched wedding shows and wedding dress shows and everything like that for YEARS, I am surprisingly not super interested in wedding planning. 

I honestly wish I could hire a wedding planner- not because I want something perfect or I can't take the stress but because it's all kind of tiresome. 

All I know is the FEELING I want. 

I want a chilly, bright fall day in PA with the smell of burning leaves and the feeling of American history all around. 

If you have ever watched M. Night Shamalyn's "The Village"- it has the same vibe as the wedding I want. A little Amishy, simple, stunning fall colors

. Does that make sense?

 Probably not to anyone who isn't from here. 

(and obsessed with fall like me)

I think I am going to pass the reins on planning to my sisters. 

My main focus is going to be on making Rich like the same music as me and on decorating our apartment. 

Lori Ann

As every fairy tale comes real

It's been 6 months and 6 days since I almost died. 

And it has been the craziest 6 months and 6 days of my life.

Crazy good and crazy bad. Sometimes just crazy. 

I am not the same person who went into the ER at 3 am on Feb. 7th. 

That date will always mark a before/after in my life. 

Like my mission did.

Like graduating college did. 

Like getting my baby Sugar did. 

I hope the next year on this blog is one of adventure, growth and progression. 

Sincerely, 

The future Mrs. Walker 

Make your dreams come true

So... 103 days until my wedding. 

I never thought I would write that on the Spinster Chronicles. 

2016 has been such a crazy year. 

I have been writing this blog for almost 7 years and my life has changed more in the last 3 months than it has in the previous 7 years. 

It makes me excited for what the future holds. 

Like super, happy excited!!!! 

So...in the meantime, I am neither a spinster, nor a wife. 

So, for the next 103 days, I welcome you to...

The Diary of a Fall Bride. 

Prepare for WAY TOO MANY fall and wedding themed posts. 

I want to record all the fun and craziness of this time in my life and introduce you to Richard Allen Walker- my victim...uh...future husband. 

That poor man. 

He has no idea I've already formulated a 5 year list of goals for him. 

He always says I am the brains in our relationship- if that's true, then he is totally the heart. 

He tells me I am beautiful every day. 

ANYWAY...

103 days, people! 

Let's do this! 

Sincerely, 

Lori Ann

(Rich's fiancee) 

Shall I stay

So....

I'm getting married. 

His name is Richard Walker. 

I will dedicate a whole blog post to him soon. 

We've known each other for two years- since he converted to my church. 

But it wasn't til I dated a few jerks that I saw the amazing value in finding a nice guy.

Rich is the NICEST guy I have ever met. 

Plus he kinda lets me do whatever I want. 

So, yeah. 

Save the date, people. 

11/12/16. 

112 Days to Go. 

It will be a civil marriage and then we will hopefully be sealed next November in the Philadelphia Temple. 

So... I guess I will need to change the name of this blog....

Maybe the Mrs. Walker Chronicles? 

Or The Confessions of an Ex-Spinster? 

Probably the next few months it should be called "The obsessed with my fall wedding Chronicles" 

Yours truly,

The Future Mrs. Walker