Today's the day, we'll say I do

 

Even though its only been a few months, the details of my wedding day are already slipping from my mind.

Which is why I want to take the opportunity to write down all the details of the day before I completely forget!

Let's do this, people!

The Wedding Day
From 7 AM to 4:20 PM

7 AM
 My wedding day begins with Rich and I waking up in our new apartment. We've already broken rule # 1- no seeing your spouse before the ceremony. It feels good to break the rules, baby!
 

 (P.S.-No, we were not living (or sleeping!) together but both ended up sleeping at the apartment the night before the wedding because I think my mom was plotting my murder and Rich had left his last place the week before)

7:30 AM
 I send Rich off to the diner for breakfast and go back to my parents house.

(Rich apparently had a leisurely breakfast and then TOOK A NAP....don't get me started on this topic!)

ANYWAY
 

9 AM
 So I get home and we are waiting for my dad's brother and my aunt and cousin to show up. They had driven in from Indiana for the wedding. No one makes me a wedding breakfast. So, I eat a smore poptart. It just feels right.

Between 9 AM and 12 PM
 My sisters are calling and organizing and running back and forth to the barn where we are going to be married at 4:30 PM.

My dad's family arrives and we spend the morning hours chatting with my Aunt Karen and cousin Melanie.

I am not going to lie. They gave me some pretty heavy handed and somber marriage advice. A lot of references to "compromise" and "working as a team".
 (I partially zone out as I rage text Rich about why he is napping!)

I don't think they are impressed with me and my "I'm going to give this marriage a year trial" ideas :)

HIGH NOON

 I escape their clutches and my mom and I go to Ulta beauty where I am getting my hair and makeup done.

I haven't had my hair done professionally since the Prom.

1998, baby!

I spend most of the hour in the hair salon talking to the stylist about her relationship with her stepdaughter and the struggles of a blended family.

Then the makeup...holy Hannah, the makeup. That woman used makeup tools I have legit never seen in my life. It was intense.

Meanwhile, my dad wanders into the Ulta, looking SO out of place.

And my mom keeps saying "You don't have to do this, Lori."

And my sisters are getting ready together...without me.

AND NOT WEARING MY WEDDING COLORS.

A lifetime later...let's say 3 PM

The stylists stop torturing me and we head home.

It's just me, my mom and Jr.

The weirds- united again on my wedding day.

My mom helps me into my dress. As she is lacing me up I am saying "I might be your first divorce, Mom!"

My uncle Walt arrives at the house with his date and tells me to run as far from marriage as I can. I tell him to stop making me cry with his inspirational thoughts, it will ruin my makeup.

It's now 4 PM 

T minus 30 minutes...

 

I realize I have to cash a paycheck so I will have money for the DJ and other things.

 

With no time to go to my bank, we swing by the Walmart on the way to the wedding and Jr and I run in to cash the check.

 

Yes, I ran into Walmart in my wedding dress.

4:15 PM 

Being stared at in the Walmart.

I can't remember if this was before or after my fake eyelashes came off.

 

Meanwhile, I keep reassuring the customer service person that I am NOT marrying Jr, who is standing next to me in a suit.

 

(Which is ironic because on my sister Erin's wedding day she kept telling the valet person that she was NOT marrying me.)

 

While I am in Walmart, declaring to anyone who will listen that I am NOT marrying my brother, my mother receives revelation in the parking lot that this marriage is a good idea.

Whew...just in the nick of time.

4:20
 

To be continued...

Lori Ann