It's all the answer

Random Saturday Night Life Updates

For the last 3 days I have been off from work. 

So my new job has been to eat like there is no tomorrow. 

I tried to get back on track today but the Captain Crunch knows where I am. It knows my name. You guys...it knows my name.

Anyway...

T-minus 120 days until my half marathon. 

I really, really would like NOT to be the last one done. 

My pink sneakers!

So...

I walked 7 miles today. 

Probably the farthest I've walked in my life at one time.

Unless you count the mission. Who the heck knows how far I walked then. (and in church shoes, no less!)

I think I am driving my family crazy with my training.

I like to get my walk (and/or run) in and then I LOVE to complain about how I feel like I've been hit by a bus for the rest of the day. 

So to spare my family further suffering, I decided to go to my office and I was going to pull EVERY single one of my client's files (all 103 of them) and update things and make notes about what I needed to do for them.

Yeaaaaahhhhhh.....

I was in my office for three hours and I did the following:

Decorated for Christmas. 

Watched an entire movie on Youtube.

Emailed my new BFF Michele. Like 19 times.

Fell asleep listening to sad Christmas music. 

Which led to...

Coming home and watching several riveting episodes of Extreme Couponing. 

Because I focus on what's important, people. There's probably a lot you could learn from me.

So then...

My sister Erin calls me and tells me that what she really wants to do when she comes home is see me dress up like a bear, scare my dad, and then possibly die jumping off the back porch in the middle of the night. 

I told her that I will follow her Christmas to-do list as long as it doesn't involve me dying.

I don't think that's too much to ask. 

And finally...

I recognize that my new blog banner looks like Christmas threw up all over it. I have no power to edit. 

I did resist the urge to photoshop a santa hat onto Sugar. 

This could be the most random random update ever. It definitely ranks among the least coherent and most boring. 

Lori Ann

p.s.- I am starting a temporary blog to track my marathon training progress and blog about health crap. So that I can reserve this blog for important stuff. Like my love of glitter. And my fights with my cat. And how captain crunch should be part of every one's marathon journey.

Look for it to be linked here tomorrow:) 

the 5th President of the United States

James Ray Monroe. 

Of all of my nieces and nephews, James would appreciate a sappy tribute the least. He avoids kisses, runs from hugs, and despises when I call him my 'turkey baby'. 

(even though his birthday is on Thanksgiving today)

So, in his honor, I will try to dial down the sappiness.

James, 

You're pretty cool, dude.

From your classically white dancing skills, to the weird arm pit sounds you like to make, to your recent love of learning bad language- everything about you is pretty dang awesome.

I can't believe you are in the double digits now. I remember the day we picked you up from the turkey aisle...ummm.... you were born at the Hospital.

 I knew that very day that you were going to be the best thing that ever happened to us.

Never, ever change, James. 

I love you so much. 

Umm... I think you're kinda ok. 

See? Not that sappy. 

Happy Birthday to the best d@#& nephew in all the world!

 (that bad language was for you, Jamesaroni!)

Love,

Aunt Lori

You're gonna be the one that saves me

I am completing my Thanksgiving Day post one day early.

A. Because I am between clients right now and

B. Because tomorrow is not only Thanksgiving but the birthday of one James Ray Monroe and I need to write his blog tribute on his birthday.

So...

Here is what I am Thankful For This Year

 (the unabridged list)

I am thankful for:

My bright pink running shoes.

My middle name. I don't know if you caught it but I am kind of obsessed with the 'Ann'. It's all Ann mania from here on out!

My cat Sugar- who has enabled me to make the graceful transition from odd, awkward older single girl to official Spinster crazy cat lady.

My new friends. The ones that won't let me self isolate and listen to my endless whining. You know who you are!

My religion. The more people I counsel, the more grateful I am to have the Gospel in my life. It's made me who I am.

And of course, my home, family, country, job, etc, etc, etc, etc..... I am truly, honestly, and deeply thankful for all of these things. But the number one thing I am thankful for and am blessed by in my life....

Jack Allen, James Ray, Elizabeth Mae, and Katherine Danielle.

My nieces and nephews. My fellow secret club members. My stealing Uncle Dave's captain crunch co-conspirators. My youtube party dancing partners.

My four favorite people in all of the world.

Thanksgiving won't be the same without you.

Lori Ann

Sugar, Sugar

I am trying to make a Christmas card of me and Sugar. 

But she won't wear a Santa hat. 

Cooperation. That is all I ask for.

I am so,so,so,so,so,so,so glad that I only have to work 3 days this week. 

I am so glad that this time next month Erin will be out visiting!

I am so glad I made myself walk 6 miles today even though it was freezing cold and even though I still feel like I was hit by a bus and my feet are kind of blistered. 

I am so glad that my nice, warm bed is waiting for me. Sweet, blessed sleep sounds so amazing right now.

And yes, it's only 8:15 pm.

Lori Ann

I want to talk about me

This one is for you, Eri. 

Of course, I look hot in all of these, but the one of me in the center square is smokin'!

That brings my November selfie total up to 20!!

And there are still 6 days left in the month. 

YES!

your favorite baby sister,

Lori Ann

Que han de llorar cuando te vayas

It's a wonder I get anything done at work between taking selfies and plotting revenge on my coworkers. 

So, one of the things I know you all love about this blog is hearing me talk about myself.

I'm kind of fascinating like that, I know. 

Therefore, you'll be especially psyched to see me write the following:

In the tradition of the recent facebook trend,

Here are....

10 things you probably don't know about me.

(The weird Wednesday Night Edition!)

10. My favorite album of all time is Songs about Jane by Maroon 5

9. I'd rather have a baby than a dog. Being a dog owner sounds so exhausting.

8. Some of my clients get angry if I don't have candy available. I've set a bad precedent.

7. I never intended to become a therapist. I really just fell into it. Most of my life I planned to be a lawyer. 

6. I judge men who take baths

5. If I weren't Mormon I would honestly consider converting to an Amish lifestyle

4. I know all 4 verses of the Star Spangled Banner. (well, there are 8 really, but only 4 are usually in hymn books)

3. When I go into Walmart I just start walking fast. I can't stop it. I feel like I have to zip around in there. I also tend to forget what state I am in when I'm in Walmart. 

2. If I were 18 again and starting college I think I'd want to train to be a general contractor. I would love to restore old homes for a living.

1. Some songs make me feel angry and even nauseated. Like that Cruel Summer song from Karate Kid. And that weird song that goes "travel the world and the seven seas, everyone is looking for something" 

I hope that helps to satisfy the insatiable curiosity that you all have about me:) 

Lori Ann

I found you here

Random Tuesday Night Updates

This is sunset from my office. It makes staying late at work not as tragic

This is sunrise from the Walmart parking lot. Yes, I go to Walmart before sunrise. I refuse to consider what that means about me and my life :) 

I tried to take a picture of myself with sunrise in the background. But the sunrise didn't show up. I must have outshone it or something:) 

I finally got my ancestry breakdown from 23andme! Who knew that I was part Finnish? So weird.


My friend Michele told me today that she has read my entire blog. All 4 painful years. Yikes. Later in the day she said that she had a headache. I wonder if there is a correlation there somewhere...?
(but seriously, coolest friend ever!)

A new client of mine came into my office today and immediately said "Oh my gosh, you' re so young!" Did I say new client? I meant my favorite client. (p.s.-I told her that I was going to brag to everyone I knew about this and she gave me full permission to do so)

My trainer Tory asked me to write a testimonial for the gym that they can post on their website. I already know what I want to say. "Tory is evil. Run, run, run far away!"

This whole healthy living crap has thrown my schedule out of whack. I've been going to bed no later than 9 pm and waking up around 4 or 5 ish. I'm like Ben Franklin. Or whoever it was that said "early to bed and early to rise make a man healthy, wealthy, and wise".

Except for the 'healthy, wealthy, and wise" that is me to a T.

It's going to be a LONG day tomorrow. Wish me luck!!

Lori Ann