Dang it feels good to be a gangster

You know, there are a lot of days that one can look forward to in life. Sweet 16. First day of college. Wedding day. Babies birth. So many wonderful and heartwarming days.

The most important of these days has arrived for me..

 

That's right, people. I have an intern.

 

I was tormented as an intern. Don't even let me go down the road. Schizophrenics, data entry, getting supervisors pepsi, and running baking groups with the mentally challenged.

 

In order to provide my intern with the experiences she needs to succeed, I have created a list of challenges that she must complete in an 8 hour period.

Good luck, Frances...

(your grade may or may not depend on the successful completion of these challenges!)

 

INTERNSHIP CHALLENGES 2010
1. Construct a lunch for a staff member. Obtain lunch items from staff, students, trash can, etc. This lunch will most likely be very random. Tell the staff person that you made them a homemade lunch to thank them for being your only true friend!

2. Walk up and down the main hallways one time having a conversation with yourself in the third person. A loud, argumentative conversation.

3. From 10-11am, end every sentence with “In accordance with prophecy”

4. Gather a group of at least 3 students and tell them that you are going to show them how they are dancing at the clubs now. Do the bunny hop or the shopping cart. No laughing or telling them “just kidding”

5. Choose one staff person randomly. Every time you see them ALL day long, wink at them. Refuse to explain if they ask..just keep winking!

6. Get a group of students to spontaneously sing together. The dorkier the song, the more internship points you get

7. Call Adam(our boss) “Captain Morgan” all day.

8. If the subject of sex comes up in any group or with discussion with staff or students, tell who ever is present that your friend “Nances” lost her virginity during a three legged race in middle school. When they ask for more details (and they will) just say “well, it’s all sealed in my..umm..her juvenile record now, but let me tell you..that school hasn’t had field day since”

9. Ask someone if they can keep a secret. When they say yes, tell them that you are a closet “Kenny Rogers” fan. Arrange for someone else to ask you in front of that staff about you liking Kenny Rogers. When this happens, turn to that person and say “I thought you could keep a secret!”

10. Make two students who are enemies- friends!

Lori Ann