This time I'm not leaving without you

Ok, so...

I don't know how I ended up a therapist.

I don't really have the right temperament for it.

Or that natural insight into people and what drives behavior.

My sister Erin is AMAZING at that. She would be a completely kick ass therapist.

I really have more of the temperament and insight of an angry PM kindergarten bus driver.

I am not making these statements "emo facebook status" style- desperately seeking reassurance.

I am just stating that sometimes I wish I could have my dream job- being paid to nap and make prank phone calls.

My diet is going ok.

I had string cheese for lunch yesterday. And it was flavorless.

But that didn't stop me from feeling enraged when I saw that someone stole my string cheese for lunch today.

I am off sugar, caffeine, and mostly carbs.

All the tools God gave us to be happy.

And now..no string cheese.

Aren't you all glad I made the decision to blog more?

There are countless more posts coming, just like this one.

Brace yourselves;)

Lori Ann

Any other day of the week is fine

Random Monday Afternoon Updates

1. I keep fighting the urge to update my facebook status in the format of star trek "Captain's Log, star date 4/8/2013...Operation " I can take benadryl before work, I will be fine" proved to be massive failure. Will commence Operation "Caffeine, caffeine, caffeine" at 1300 hours..

2. Don't steal that idea from me. I know you want to!!

3.  I am doing what is called  Open Access at work today. It's where you meet with whoever walks in off the street for an appointment. Some days you only get 2 people. Some days you get 8 in a row. It's like a horrible Russian roulette...well..I guess Russian roulette itself is; by definition, horrible..anyway..

4. It's going to be 80 degrees tomorrow. This enrages me. I hate, hate, hate all the people who moan and whine about 'when is Spring coming?' I always want to say "Oh, don't worry. It will be here before you know it, with its INSUFFERABLE heat. Let's just enjoy this chilly breezes for another day or two, for the love of all that is holy!"

5. Another appointment just popped up on my schedule. I am going to petition to be allowed to enter "Blogging and staring out the window into other people's offices" into my daily schedule. I think 3 or 4 hours of the day should cover it.

Bye

Lori Ann

I can see it in your eyes

Life has been crazy lately.

I hate the way this blog is going. Where the posts are increasingly less focused and less frequent.

I haven't given up my love for blogging. I'm too narcasitic for that.

So; once again, I vow to blog more frequently. Maybe I will try to hit every single day of April (besides the first and second , of course)

And I will be blogging about important stuff too. Love. Life. Revenge. How generic crystal lite stabbed me in the back.

All the important stuff.

For now,  I will catch you up on my life via a series of photos.

Now..this is the moment when I usually get really excited reading a post..."Oh good, here come strangely posed pictures of groups of people I know nothing about! Sweet!

This lasted for literally 2 seconds. Trying to get pictures of my sister's  children is like being a  wild life photographer
They can't be caged or tied down:)  

Two cutest girls IN THE WHOLE WORLD!

I just love this one. James; surrounded by women. I think this will be the story of his life. 

Elly won 1000 tickets at our last trip to the arcade.  We've just got that lucky gene. Like when I won 40 dollars in Vegas.

I was on vacation for one week and came back to this- 59 emails

And 13 voicemails.


And I considered myself lucky!!

Tomorrows Topic...My parents are spending my inheritance on trips to Europe, those devils!! ;) 


Lori Ann

You'll never see the moon

It's snowing here today. 

This is strange weather. It's probably the end of the world or something. 

Today my parents come home from Paris. 

I am excited to see them and even watch their 700 picture slide show.

I am blessed to have the family that I have. 

Especially my sisters.

My mom must have had a thing for strappy sandals

My parents are great- slightly evil, of course, but great.

But when I think of home, I think of my sisters.

They support me in everything. They are the only two people on Earth who really know me. 

They've told off bad friends of mine, helped me move, listened to me rant for hours, encouraged me when I could barely put one foot in front of the other, called me when a song on the radio reminds them of me, threw me strange and hilarious birthday parties, picked me up off the side of the road when my car broke down, they do my hair when I want to feel confident, they get freaked out excited for me when I accomplish something. 

Danielle bought me a gray sweater dress for when I reach my weight loss goal from all of this crazy dieting. 

Erin sends me festive flowers randomly.

Anyway, I know they don't approve of posts like this. 

But I made the decision that I wouldn't leave anything in my life unsaid. 

Lori Ann

 (the baby) 

Random thoughts on a Saturday Night

So...

This dieting is making me feel crazy. I think it's probably the first diet I have ever been on when I have had to address my actual food addiction. I am dreaming about English muffins. And getting weirdly crabby with people. I think that jolly Lori only functions with a large amount of caffeine and sugar. 

My parents have been in Paris all week. I've decided that I am going to be the next one to go on an exciting adventure. Maybe Jersey. It is; after all, the Paris of the East Coast:)
 (the bay always did remind me of the Seine) 

I miss blogging. I think sugar powered my blogging before. So prepare for a slightly darker tone to my future posts. Instead of song lyric titles, it will be excerpts from my stream of consciousness angst poetry. Wait...that will be what the posts are. The titles will be angry, declarative statements, like " Jelly is death" and stuff like that.

I think this is what this blog has needed for a long time. An edgy, emo undertone. I won't be satisfied until my readers leave every post asking themselves "Was that just a blog post or a cry for help?" Just thinking about it makes me want to go and paint my nails blood red and try to add another piercing to my ear.

We had a 'no parents, no rules' sleepover with the kids last night. (Jr and I). It got pretty wild. Some of the children stayed up until 4 am. (they staggered down the stairs in the morning like they were hung over!)

My favorite moment (besides watching James dance with a corn dog in each hand) was taking them star gazing on the hill behind our chapel. They all ran up before me and all I could see as I walked up was the kids, looking up, huddled together against the cold, against the backdrop of a stunning starry sky. It will always be one of my favorite moments from my whole life. I know it's not the same; because I am their aunt, not their mom, but I love them all so much. I wish I could give them the stars. 

I think I am going to update my blog header tomorrow. Brace yourselves. 

A quote to end this scintillating post...

Lori Ann

Random Thoughts: The me gusta el papa edition

Ok, so I know I've left you all hanging waiting for the tour of my office. Don't worry. It's coming soon.

But on to other random thoughts...

We now have a Latin pope of Italian descent.

If he weren't...

a. Straight

b. Over 60

c. the Pope

He would so be my dream man.

I feel like doing something crazy this weekend. I keep trying to tell Danielle we should go back to NYC. I just feel like getting out and seeing the world.

I have been off diet coke for about a month now. I tried one sip last week and it was sooo gross. I am never going back to soda again. It doesn't even sound appealing.

I have been dieting, people. Which has led me to watching youtube clips at night of people eating delicious food. Sometimes I make my family describe what they are eating and how it tastes.

No food addiction issues there, eh?

The Monroe's and I are going on an epic vacation this summer. First to Palmyra and the Hill Cumorah pagent. Then to Niagra Falls. Then we cross into Mordor...uh...Canada, to see Danielle's mission place- Montreal. We're taking the children out of the country. Holy hannah.

I don't know what has hit me. Maybe it's my age. Maybe it's because I finally have a stable job that I mostly love. Maybe it's an early mid life crisis.

I just want to LIVE MY LIFE.

Anyway,

The office tour is going to be up by the end of the week. I'm still considering adding weird, emo music so it's less of a tour and more of a journey!!

Lori Ann

Baby it's cold outside (Part 1)

You guys.

It's snowing here.

And I got to my office two hours early but couldn't focus on anything.

So I did what any hardworking, professional, career minded girl does in that moment.

 I laid on my floor and read and then I made a video of my office.

Oh yes.

It's going to be featured on this blog tonight!

 It just got real in here. 

Lori Ann

p.s.- As a little preview to further set you on the edge of excitement, here is an excerpt of the dialogue taken directly from the video..

"And over here we have my lamp..I got it at IKEA. It's pretty, right? Anyway, now to the bookcase.."