Cheers to lunch at night

Erin is home!!!

I always forget how crazy and fun it is here until Erin gets home. 

Here are just a few quotes from her being here about 12 hours...

Erin Leigh!!!

"If you and Lor got into a lesbian relationship, you would totally be the husband"
(to my sister Danielle)

"Yeah, everyone better get their flu shots before they get bitten by an illegal immigrant"

"Don't point your sausage finger at me!"

"You better get this cat to the vet!"

"People are just telling me that you post too many selfies, that's all"

"What are you learning from watching the news? Nothing!"

"You are living the life of a 65 year old woman!"

" I gotta be truthful. It creates safe boundaries"

"Grandpa has been pooping in a bucket"

"Why are you tired? You went to bed at like 8:30 pm!"

"You should be grateful for any donut we give you!"

"Your boy RSimmons was last seen holed up in a cabin with a bunch of donuts"

"Why are you all raged up, juiced up, and chasing the dragon at like 6:30 in the morning?"

"If we were druggies , I would be the pot head and you would be the coke addict"

Erin is the coolest person on Earth, I swear.

Even if she makes me feel like a bad cat mom :)

I got so lucky to get her as a sister.

SO LUCKY.

Lori Ann

The Ginger Snap



Dawn and the love of my life. Kelly.
(the dog I WILL steal from her one day)

Yesterday was my friend Dawn's birthday.

This will, therefore, (after years of family tributes) be my FIRST official, friend birthday tribute in almost 5 years of TSC.

It's a banner day, people!

Here are my very favorite things about this amazing girl on the day after her birthday...

Dawn is so sweet.

She has a very overwhelming job- she is our psychiatric medical assistant and deals with all of our client's medication issues, insurance companies, etc- and we've got like 10 psychiatrists- but there is never a time that I walk by her office and she doesn't say "Hey girl!" and take time to listen to me whine.

Dawn is a feisty red head.

She is actually slowly making me less of a ginger hater.

(Although I am super jealous of her fair 'I look like I am 18" skin. Seriously. Super. Jealous.)

Dawn is thoughtful.

She never forgets any one's birthday or special event.

She is the one that counted down my 1st half marathon with me.

She made me a sign EVERY DAY for like 50 days.

And since that wasn't enough, she organized a big (surprise) celebration, had a giant breakfast, made about 30 Team Lori shirts (which everyone wore all day), had the CEO stop by to cheer me on, had me featured in the company newsletter...you know..just a few small things.  

Dawn is a good mom.

She is at every baseball game, every school function, at the kitchen table doing homework after a long day at work.

She is exactly the kind of mom I would like to be.

Dawn makes me laugh. 

She sends me random emails and texts throughout the day when I feel like I am going slowly crazy.

Last night she sent me this picture.

It's hard to describe the awesomeness of Dawn in just words. 

But I guess what I am trying to say is that she is one of the kindest, hardest working, coolest girls I know.

I thank God for her friendship every day.

I think this is going to be your best year yet, Dawn!

You are an incredible person and such an amazing friend.

I hope you know that.

Lori Ann 

p.s.- The cookie war carried on into Day 2 last night. It wasn't pretty. There were accusations of cookie theft and cookie hording and it got pretty ugly. Also, my mom keeps saying "What can I do for Dawn?" Just be ready, my parents may take to lurking around your house, trying to be "helpful" :)

I'm following in His ways

Do NOT attempt to take cookies from my father. It will not end well.

This is my dad. Eating a giant plate of cookies made for him by my friend Dawn.

 (Happy Birthday, Dawnie!)

(I am totally going to write a post on Dawn tomorrow.

That girl rocks and has survived friendship with me for OVER A YEAR. Unheard of)

ANYWAY

He stopped by her pool on Saturday morning and fixed something. Just because I asked him to.

He was out there sweating. Swearing. The usual.

Dawn kept telling me "I'm going to pay him" and I told her "Don't even try. He will be offended".

I've had my grievances with the old man over the years and I always tell him that he should be paying for my therapy but I will always say that he is my example of true charity.

I can't count the number of times he had done something for someone not expecting anything in return.

 Rejecting any offer of money or thanks.

Never telling anyone what he did.

He used to take the missionaries grocery shopping and would stuff their carts full of stuff and then, when they tried to stop him from paying, he would say "You aren't big enough to stop me".

He mowed our next door neighbors lawn for years (she had a lot of issues) and no one knew. I found out when I happened to see him out there one day and asked him what was up.

Most people don't know how charitable he is because he doesn't talk about it or look for recognition.

There are qualities in each of my family members that I wish I had.

 Ways they are Christlike and such an example to me.

Charity is that quality in my dad.

I got really, really lucky when Heavenly Father chose him to be my dad.

Lori Ann

Only God knows where I've been

And now..after a two month hiatus...on with my life story.

 You can stop holding your breath in anticipation.

 (if you are still alive after holding your breath for two months!)

So, I finished graduate school at age 27 and did what every Masters Educated 27 year old does.

I moved home. 

(my life story is so badass, amirite?)

It took me about a month to find a job and in that month I read every single poem ever written by Emily Dickinson and crossed that off my Bucket List.

 (if you ever want to read about nature and death...look no further)

Nature and Death...and more Nature and Death. 

I started work as a "program specialist" at BARC.

 Which used to stand for "Bucks County Association for Retarded Citizens" before 'retarded' became no longer politically correct. 

I have no idea what it stands for now

I was basically a case manager at a day program for adults with intellectual disabilities. 

Because, as we see throughout my life, I had no plan and just flailed along until I found a job.

This job was interesting, tough, and not what I thought I would be doing. 

I was passing out meds, occasionally helping people in the bathroom, doing a lot of mindless paperwork, holding meeting that served no purpose, working part time in a group home at night, and wondering why I had just gone into so much debt to do this.

I did get to meet one amazing girl though.

 Her name is (or was before she got married) Karen Pepper.

 She later got her doctorate.

 Making her officially Dr. Pepper.

 Coolest thing ever. 

I stole this from her facebook. Like a stalker. 

She only lasted at BARC about a month. It's kind of an intense job.

 My CNA training was the only thing that kept me there for 9 months. 

I was used to the craziness and unrealistic job expectations.

 I am much more uncomfortable in a professional setting than I am in a high stress, running around kind of job.

Anyway, I mention Karen because she is one of the 3 people I have met in my life who REALLY got me.

(yes, I have a list of people. Besides my sisters- who are truly the ONLY people on Earth who completely get me)

She challenged me and made me feel like I was sharpening my brain and my sense of humor with every interaction. 

One thing I do almost every day is feel like I am 'dumbing myself down' or playing a role. I have no idea why.

Maybe because people don't really get me.

 But she did. 

She and I used to talk only in Guns and Roses song lyric quotes around other employees.

They must have thought we were insane. 

Anyway, by this point Danielle and Jack had moved to North Carolina and they had 3 kids.

(this was before the arrival of the infamous Katherine the Great)

I visited them a few times and I missed my niece and nephews so much. 

So, I decided to move down to the South. 

Without a job.

Without a plan. 

With just enough money to last a month or two. 

Other than my mission, it was the best decision I ever made for my life. 

That, though, is the next chapter in this life story.

Lori Ann

A thousand more

I think my bipolar is clearly demonstrated on this blog.

 I am going to use it as evidence when I apply for disability. 

Yesterday I was whining and today I feel happy again.

So, since it's a happy day today I wanted to cover a few more 

moments of perfect happiness

from my life. 

In no particular order, here they are...

The day I left the mission field is moment one.

I knew my mom was going to come get me.

 Chicago isn't that far from PA, maybe a 12-15 hour drive and my parents had not gotten to pick up Danielle or Jr, so my mom said she would come get me.

 Seeing her walk through that door at the mission home was a moment of perfect happiness in my life.

 To be quickly followed by another moment- when my dad surprised me and showed up as well.

 My mom said to go and look outside the door and there he was.

 Within 2 minutes he was lecturing me and giving me life advice.

 After an intense 18 months of not seeing and barely talking to my family, seeing them in that moment was what I bet it feels like when we go home to Heavenly Father.

 Perfect happiness.

Another moment was the day we (the employees of Penn Foundation) toured our new building.

 You all know I love the building I work in.

 Anyway, it was bright and beautiful and then my supervisor pointed me towards me office.

 I've had many "offices"

 (the quotes are necessary)

I think 13 to be exact- starting with my shady half office/half game room at my first internship.

 Most of them were the size of a shoebox and slightly run down.

  Seeing this bright, big office made me feel like I was really an adult.

 Really a therapist.

 Really successful in that I was doing something I loved.

 It was a moment of perfect happiness. 

October 8th, 2002.

 The day after I turned 23, I became an aunt.

 I am so jealous of everyone that gets to be an aunt at a younger age

. Being an aunt is the best thing about my life.

 I didn't know what love really was until October 8th, 2002.

 (Even if I was on a layover in Chicago when Jack Jack was actually born)

And those are today's

moments of perfect happiness. 

We will return to your regularly scheduled whining tomorrow. 

We will also discuss my new plan to give up sugar. 

(as recommended by my nutritionist)

Get ready for the sugar detox. 

It's going to be painful for all of us. 

Lori Ann

How can you say

Random Life Updates on an early Wednesday Morning



The infamous Hinsdale Four



Only one week until this evil group is all back together again!

(I copied it from facebook from my phone-sorry for the background)

I'm going to the movies tonight with my mom and my friends. Yes, I'm 13 again, people!

I have been feeling so run down lately.

 Like just tired all of the time.

 I took the day off yesterday because I had a horrible night and a low grade fever.

 But I kept calling my sister Erin all day going "do you think I have the rep of someone who is always sick?"

 She is always really reassuring.

 "Lor..you are such a narcissist. No one even cares about you calling out"

Danielle and Jack and  their kids are at the beach this week.

 I miss them.

 But I love how much fun they are having.

I am SO SO SO excited for Erin to come home.

 Everything is more fun with Erin here.

I have been off track with my half marathon training since the 13.1 I did last week.

 As in I haven't trained since then:(

 I am ready to get back on track though.

I've been feeling lately like its really time for me to get a handle on my eating.

 It's the one missing piece to a healthier life.

 I've given up soda and serious overeating but I need to give up sugar and snacks.

That's my next step.

I changed my insurance (due to it going up over a hundred a month- thanks, Obamacare) and now I have the high deductible plan.

 Last night my meds (3 scripts) cost me 114.

 Holy Hannah.

 You just can't win, people!

I need to find a way to get excited about my job again.

 I think it's been contributing to my burnout.

 I've been praying for more compassion and ways to find the strength to do this job.

 There are days I dream of having a manual labor job that doesn't require me to think or care.

I think part of my nature is to just never be really happy.

 I think I like existing in a state of semi-unhappiness.

ANYWAY

Today is going to be a good day.

 I'm done work at 4.

 I'm going to the movies.

 Then I'm getting all of my cleaning projects done because I don't have to be back to work until 12 :)

Wish me luck!!

Lori Ann

Dark the stars



My sister

Yesterday I had to speak in church.

For those of you non-mormons (you know who you are), a little explanation is probably in order.

Mormons don't have a pastor in the traditional sense.

One man (or woman) that gets up and preaches from the pulpit.

Instead all members of the church (usually 12 and older) are asked to speak at different times.

 I usually end up speaking about once a year.

You are given a topic (or sometimes you are encouraged to be inspired to think of one) and then you have about 15 minutes to speak to the whole congregation.

Yesterday my topic was sister missionary work.

As Mormons (or members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) we are asked to become missionaries.

 Jesus was a missionary for the last 3 years of his life.

 One of our primary directives as Christians is to share the word of God with others.

In other words, we are those annoying people who knock on your door when you are trying to sleep in on Saturday mornings.

 (we know you are there, so don't try to hide..we'll just keep knocking!)

I never thought of serving a mission.

 It has always been very optional for girls.

 For young men it's seen as a commandment, but for sisters (or women) it's always been a "if you want to" kind of deal.

I didn't want to.

I don't like to get out of my comfort zone.

I don't like wearing dresses.

But then my sister Danielle got her mission call to Montreal, Canada.

And I knew, in that moment, that I would serve.

I served a mission in Chicago Illinois from 2001-2002.

When I was 21 and 22 years old.

(I talk about it in my life story blog posts..which I do plan on finishing, by the way) 

Hardest, craziest, longest, shortest, most incredible, most intensely depressing, most rewarding time of my life.

In my talk I discussed how; in those 18 months of my life, I learned more than I have ever learned before or since.

More than anything else I learned to be fearless.

And I have my sister Danielle to thank for that.

She was the first sister missionary our family (entire extended family) had ever had.

If she hadn't served first, I would never have had the motivation or bravery to serve myself.

She, unlike me, has always been fearless.

She made me realize that you don't know the impact your life will have on others.

She literally changed my life.

Without my mission, I would likely not have finished college, much less graduate school.

Would not have had the bravery to live in so many different states.

Go to Europe.

 Get my clinical licensure.

Run a half marathon.

(ok, walk most of it)

Go after my dreams. 

Everything brave about me, I owe to her.

So, even though it's not your birthday and I know you hate this sentimenal crap...

Thanks, Moses.

You are everything I wish I could be.

Lori Ann 

(peanut butter jelly)

 P.S.

On an unrelated side note, my mother has been having crazy sleepovers and summer projects with my sisters kids.

Like these 'panda bear cupcakes' that she and Katy were making to try and alleviate world wide poverty.

They made 6 dollars.
(probably mostly from their favorite "customer" Grandpa- who spent 20 dollars at the last lemonade stand)

 I'm not sure how much has made it to the poor so far.

I'm surrounded by craziness.