Ok,
So I am going private starting tomorrow. Or tonight. Whenever I get these email addresses ready.
Oh yes.
Of course, this does put a crimp in my plan to be the next famous single female Mormon blogger in her mid 30's.
Or should I say the ONLY famous single female Mormon blogger in her mid 30's?
Sometimes you've got to let a dream die.
(Just like my dreams of Superbowl glory died last night)
But I digress.
It seems only fitting that at the end of an era at TSC we discuss my discussion with my nieces and nephews about the Zombie Apocalypse today.
Here is how it went down:
Someone brings up the topic of the Zombie Apocalypse. Can't remember who. It's the kind of thing that often comes up in casual conversation, eh?
Elly states "If there is a Zombie Apocalypse, I'm going to have a knife. And a flame thrower".
She already scares me. A flame thrower would make it so much worse. |
James does his best Zombie impression, literally falling over into the couch because "that's what a zombie would do, they are dumb".
The zombies would probably run when they saw THIS! |
Jack Jack frequently interrupts, accusing his siblings of being "impractical" and "unrealistic" in their weapon choices.
He states "At best we'd have sniper rifles and maybe a few knives. Or an assault weapon...unless we got access to an Army base".
I love this literal, practical young man so much. |
James begins a long and detailed plan of his to have a jet pack, filled with gasoline, which he would then use to suffocate the zombies.
Jack scoffs, stating "And where are you going to get this limitless gasoline jet pack?"
He then informs us that the only remaining part of a Zombies brain is the part that controls the central nervous system and we should go for that in order to kill the zombie.
orrrrrrrrrrrrr, we could give them some 'ginko baloba' (I'm spelling it phonetically, dammit!) which would restore their brain health and render them no longer zombies.
None of them are impressed when I ask if we could use the paddle on the zombies or a herd of attack cats. I can see the contempt in their eyes.
It's clear I'm not going to make it out of the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse alive. I think they have already written me off.
Anyway,
Kind of random. But these are the conversations I want to remember.
(So I can bring them up in my speech at their wedding receptions!)
Lori Ann
p.s.- Don't tell the others but the one I would actually trust to protect me during a Zombie Apocalypse would be this one.
Look what she did to the la la loopsie pony. She is merciless. The zombies don't stand a chance. |
Ashleeradkins@gmail.com
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